In a big turn of events, this beautiful human is heading home!!

On Tuesday I got an email from her Rotary coordinator in Sweden. He said they were having a meeting on Wednesday and asked that we be present for it. Alan and I logged in to the meeting Wednesday morning to meet with Eve, her host dad, her youth exchange coordinator, and a higher up in Swedish Rotary.

The goal was to talk with Eve about what’s going on and address issues they each were having with the exchange. Eve was unhappy with lots of things, her host family was unhappy with her eating habits (apparently they had dealt with anorexia in the past and were feeling triggered), and her Rotary folks were unhappy with her lack of participation in Rotary activates. We had a good conversation, resulting in Eve saying she really just wants to go home and the Swedish folks saying they don’t think the program is working in this situation. So it was decided — she’s coming home!

There were a lot of emotions at the meeting, and afterwards (in my case, anyway, I can’t speak for everyone else), but ultimately I think the right decision was made. Eve was not able or willing to make the changes necessary for the program to be successful; her host family was kind, but missing the siblings and connectedness to draw her out; she spent a lot of time alone; she was exhausted from her school-related internship; and everyone was worried about her eating habits. I guess I can take some of the blame for that one. :/

Eve spent the end of elementary school and all of middle school completely miserable. She hated her friend group and everything about school. Of course, Covid didn’t help… though in her opinion it totally helped because it allowed her to stay home and ignore the real world! We started the Rotary Exchange program in that mindset. In high school things slowly turned around, with last year being an awesome year in school. She had a new (old, better) friend group and enjoyed her classes – mostly. She was interested in traveling, but less interesting in escaping from high school. Now, in Sweden, she is miserable again. It has been hard to support her from afar in a situation so reminiscent of the past. I tried balancing support and distance, encouragement and hands-off, etc. Regardless, it didn’t seem to matter.

Once the decision was made, the tears were released, and goodbyes were said – the planning began! She is thrilled to be coming home. I am, of course, thrilled to have her back! I spent today coordinating Rotary approvals, flight arrangements, school re-enrollment, holiday travel plan changes, etc. All totally worth it so I can hug my favorite baby girl a million times on Sunday!! 🤗

Her Rotary coordinator her in the US sent her a very nice email today. He said:

“It will be natural to second-guess some things for a while. Decisions to go on exchange, decisions to stay or not stay; all very normal and expected when a decision like this is made. If these things cross your mind, please remember that success can almost never be measured with a calendar. If you have grown, learned new things and met new people, the exchange is a success and much more importantly, you are a success. The end date doesn’t matter as much. We look forward to welcoming you back and hearing about your time in Sweden.”

I thought that was very kind and I appreciate their support. I’ll be sure to tell them. 😊