Cold, clear, sunny, and everything is snow
covered. Currier and Ives-type of day. Beautiful.

I feel like lately I’ve only
been posting when I’m tired and cranky, so I restrained from
posting last night and decided to start on a good note :) I’m
so excited about Christmas – less than two weeks now! We have a
little Christmas tree up and Lex is entranced each morning when
I turn the lights on. He just stares with his little O mouth.
He has also been “helping” me wrap presents. He loves the
wrapping paper (and it’s good because its thick enough that it
doesn’t rip immediately) and he likes playing with the ribbons
and bows. I think he’ll have fun on Christmas morning.

I decided this week that we
need to get serious about sleeping. He still isn’t sleeping
through the night, and it’s getting more and more difficult to
put him down for naps and at night. Right now it almost seems
like he’s in pain or something, but he screams his head off
when we lay him in the crib. No fun. Sometimes he falls asleep
after a few minutes of screaming, but other times it’s almost
impossible. He finally fell asleep last night after I rocked
him for a long time in the dark living room with some calming,
womb music playing. It breaks my heart though because I don’t
see him all day then when I get home I have about an hour with
him before bedtime and then I spend another hour with him
screaming as I try to put him to bed. He must hate me. Not
really, I’m sure, but it’s hard. And I know it’s best for him
to go to sleep, but it’s getting harder and harder.

I’ve read all the advice
about sleeping and the one thing that we don’t do, and I’m sure
will help, is a solid routine. We just aren’t very routine
people ourselves, so it’s tough trying to implement that for
him. All along I’ve sort of assumed that he’ll outgrow this and
start sleeping soon, but yesterday it occured to me that he may
not outgrow it and as he moves into the toddler years it will
probably just get worse. Ack!! So, we are going to work on
routine for Lex and by default routine for Alan and I. This is
a pretty bad time of year to start this (travelling next
weekend, Christmas the following), but I’m going to give it a
shot. Worst that will happen is no change :) I really like
cuddling with him the bed though when he’s sleeping nicely.
I’ll miss that once he sleeps through the night in his crib.
But, I know it’s for the best.

Ok, now back to work with me.
This month has been slower than the last few, and for that I’m
grateful. I feel like I’m finally on top of things at work and
able to go above and beyond – instead of just barely eeking by.
Imagine what I could do with a full nights sleep! :)

Happy holidays all!