Lex has stopped napping. This has been
exhausting and stressful (mentally, physically, and
emotionally) for both of us. For awhile now he’s fallen asleep
only after Alan or I physically restrain him by wrapping him in
our arms in our bed and holding him still until he falls
asleep. We call this “cuddling him to sleep” and he hates it
worse than anything. And when he screams, we sing. So we sing
and cuddle him until he falls asleep. Mean parenting, huh? But
lately this hasn’t even worked and Eve’s nap schedule has made
it difficult for me to lay down with Lex every day. So this
week I decided to try “mommy quiet time” instead. Lex doesn’t
have to nap, but he does have to give me one hour of quiet time
where he sits in the living room and reads books and doesn’t
talk to me. This makes him pretty happy and he’s pretty good at
it, but unfortunately it’s not as restful as a nap so he’s
still exhausted by bedtime. We’ve been putting him to bed by
7pm and he usually goes down in a screaming fury. :( Then wakes
up at 6:30am, still tired. This morning he was rubbing his eyes
at 6:30am, fussing and crying by 7am, and telling me he was too
tired and needs a nap by 7:30am. “Are you tired? Are you tired
and need a nap?” (“you” = “I” or “me” in Lex’s world). So I
tried to get him to lay down on the couch (Eve and Alan were
occupying both bedrooms), but he wouldn’t, so we started our
day (every day, all week) very tired, which results in more
meltdown, more rebellion, and more “wanna just do nothing”
days.

On top of his issues, Eve has
decided that the best, and only, place to sleep at night is in
my arms. Not my just bed, but my arms. I love her dearly, but I
don’t sleep well with babies in my arms. She won’t sleep long
in her bed and she won’t sleep with Alan, just with me. She’s
become quite the momma’s girl. It’s hard to complain about that
:) I guess we’re going to have to do some sleep training soon,
and hope it doesn’t disturb Lex’s desperately needed sleep.
Alan’s idea is to bring Lex in the bed with us instead and
letting Eve CIO (cry it out) in the crib. We did a modified
version of that with Lex around this age and it worked well. It
was emotionally tough, but worth it.

So,
ready for my tired rant? I haven’t had a good one of these in
awhile. I’m also struggling because it’s coming up on Christmas
and I LOVE CHRISTMAS but we are so broke. My daycare business
isn’t exactly picking up as quickly as I’d hoped. The baby got
pushed back two weeks and everyone else I’ve spoken with either
has an infant (I can’t take any more infants) or is looking for
work. I’ve got several people with two year olds who say that
as soon as they find work they’ll sign up with me. But that
still leaves me broke and somewhat in limbo for the holiday
season :( It’s Eve’s first Christmas and Lex’s first that he’s
old enough to understand. It’s also the first year we will be
at our house Christmas morning. I really want to buy them fun
things (not a lot, just a few) so they can have a wonderful
Christmas morning, but we are so broke :( Alan keeps reminding
me that they will never remember this and they’ll get plenty of
presents from everyone else that evening and over the next few
days, but it’s not the same. It’s more about me, I guess :)
Selfish, but oh well. I also really like shopping for others
and wrapping presents and all that jazz. I wanted to take them
to the mall to see Santa and help me pick out presents (they
are both great at shopping), but we won’t be doing that this
year. I just love Christmas! Anyway, that’s just a rant and if
anyone is looking for a gift for Eve, she (hehe… ok, I)
really wants a pair of gingerbread Robeez. Alan pointed
out, rightfully, that since they are holiday shoes she’ll only
be able to wear them for a month or two, but I say they are
just so cute!

Ok, I’m done with my
tired rant and Lex is reminding me that “mommy quiet time” is
over so I’m outta here.