I start a new job tomorrow. I am feeling prepared, but nervous nonetheless. I’ll be teaching pre-k at a beautiful little school nearby. It is a long-term sub position while their regular teacher is off on maternity leave. I’ll be the teacher until Christmas vacation. I get to do all the fun holiday crafts. :)
It was a long and emotionally tumultuous path to arrive at this position, but I’m glad I took the journey and ended up where I did. The first week of school my kids went back to school and I got myself organized. I wrote up a long to-do list and started checking things off. I made healthy food to eat and exercised every day. I was enjoying the at-home gig. Then a friend told me about a preschool position that was open and a day later I applied for a full-time kindergarten co-teacher position. Both had some amazing pros, but some serious cons as well, and I again began my internal deliberation about home versus work versus me. I want to be home with the kids, I want to continue my career, and I want to take care of myself, both physically and emotionally. Unfortunately there just isn’t any way to do it all.
I interviewed at the preschool and decided not to take the job. Then I interviewed for the kindergarten position and, after a TON of internal debate and with apologies and gracious thanks to those who were around to listen and support my complex decision making process, I turned that down as well. That was especially hard because the school is amazing and the job would have been great, professionally. Unfortunately it was a full-time job at a different school district, which means after school care for my kids and mismatched vacation schedules. There may come a time when that works, but this year is not that time. This year my kids still need me at home in the afternoon and I still need to be there for them. So I turned down the kindergarten job.
“You can’t always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find,
You get what you need.” – The Rolling Stones
A day later I got a call from the director of the preschool at that same school. She said she heard I turned down the K job and was wondering if maybe I would be interested in a part-time pre-k job instead. Heck yeah! I went back and interviewed with the pre-k team and it was a pretty easy decision. It’s part time and just through Christmas, but I’ll still get the teacher experience (good for the resume!) and the afternoons at home (good for the family!) Best of both worlds.
I start tomorrow and although I know it will go well and I know I made the right choice, I still have first day of school jitters! Wish me luck.