Sorry I haven’t posted in awhile, but it’s
\n been an emotionally draining week. As a few of you may know, we
\n have been struggling with the daycare and, since solid decision
\n making seems to be completely out of my range of capabilities
\n these days, I’ve been struggling trying to figure out what to
\n do. I’m fortunate to have found great daycare kids, all are
\n happy, funny, and very nice kids and I’ve been lucky. However,
\n having kids here all day, every day, has taken a toll on me and
\n my kids. I’m very stir crazy these days and as spring
\n approaches (though you’d never know it looking out the window!)
\n I can’t help thinking of all the things I want to do with the
\n kids that I won’t be able to since we’ll be confined to our
\n house (or at least our property) every day. I’ve been trying to
\n get them out on weekends, but Lex prefers to be home on
\n weekends because daddy is there and no extra kids. So that
\n leaves me struggling with him or staying him. During the week
\n my normally sweet boy has become a bit of a menace, jumping on
\n the girls, pushing them, taking toys, and generally making them
\n cry (which they are VERY quick to do). I feel like I’m spending
\n most of my days disciplining him and usually cranky with him.
\n Alan and I were talking about the fact that I need to
\n discipline the girls too, because tattling and bossiness aren’t
\n considered good social behavior. I guess I’m not real good with
\n discipline and especially not when there’s always someone who
\n needs a new diaper, new bottle, nose wipe, more food, etc. It
\n just seems like there’s never time. It’s frustrating. I know
\n Lex’s behavior issues are because he gets no alone time and no
\n mommy time. Eve has also turned into a fuss pot and spends her
\n time crawling around after me and crying a lot. We thought she
\n had an ear infection (I could have sworn!) but the doc says
\n she’s fine, so now it must be teething or attachment issues or
\n just too much activity all the time. It’s hard to tell with a
\n baby. So I’ve been thinking for awhile about whether or not
\n daycare is really the best option for my family. The money is
\n ok and we definitely need all the money we can get, but at what
\n cost? And when do you switch from “give it all you’ve got”
\n mentality to “it’s just not working and\/or not worth the
\n effort.” I hate to be a quitter, but I also hate how I feel
\n every day these days.<\/p>\n
So, I made the
\n decision to stop doing daycare. I told the parents this week
\n and everyone was understanding, but upset. It’s really hard to
\n find good childcare around here and almost impossible to find
\n infant care. I’ve given them two weeks notice, but I won’t be
\n locking the door in any one’s face either. My full-time toddler
\n will be going back to her previous daycare center this Monday
\n and I think the family is good with that. I think she’ll be
\n happier there too. I’m hoping that baby can find a good
\n alternative though. Like I said, infant care is hard to find
\n and I really feel the worst for her. That’s what made my
\n decision even harder. She’s also the sweetest baby on the
\n planet and if I had any way to get 3 car seats in my car I’d
\n keep her in a heartbeat! But, alas, I don’t. I may end up
\n keeping my T\/TH toddler though. I’ve been talking with her mom
\n about it. That would still give us three days to get out or be
\n quiet at home, and then two days with her. I don’t know if that
\n will happen or not yet. See why I was struggling though? For my
\n own hopes at sanity and family peace I have to put a huge
\n burden on other families. <\/p>\n
To put things
\n in perspective though, my friend emailed me last night that her
\n 1yr old son has to have abdominal surgery. The little guy had
\n kidney problems before birth and now needs surgery for a
\n bladder problem. Let’s all keep him in our thoughts and
\n prayers.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Sorry I haven’t posted in awhile, but it’s been an emotionally draining week. As a few of you may know, we have been struggling with the daycare and, since solid decision making seems to be completely out of my range … Continue reading